Positive self talk

We can be so used to the way that we talk to ourselves that we don’t notice when our self talk is impacting us negatively. When I really started paying attention to the way I talked to myself and questioning my self talk, I was surprised to see how unkind I was being towards myself. Working on changing my self talk was one of the first steps in my healing journey (read a little more about that here, if you’d like). Working on my self talk was part of how I learned to create safety for myself, and this felt sense of safety unlocked the door to a bigger emotional healing journey.

Paying attention to the way I talked to myself and journaling and reflecting on my self talk was very helpful to me, and I hope it will be helpful to you as well. To that end, these journal prompts for positive self talk are designed to help you take an inventory of your self talk, evaluate your self talk and explore the roots of your self talk, and make a plan for creating positive self talk.

Journal prompts for positive self talk

Photo of woman touching her reflection in glass. — *Photo atiger/stock.adobe.com*

As you work through these journal prompts, keep in mind that some of your self talk may be full phrases or sentences that you consciously say to yourself in your mind. However, some of your self talk might be fleeting thoughts that cross your mind without being fully put into words, and your self talk may even be a pattern of behavior or pattern of emotional response without accompanying words (I like to think of this as the internal equivalent of all the non-verbal cues that get exchanged when you’re communicating with someone else).

Journal prompts for taking a self talk inventory

Becoming aware of how you talk to yourself and how you respond to yourself is the first step to creating positive self talk. These journal prompts are designed to help bring your self talk into your conscious awareness.

Write down 3 positive things you commonly say to yourself.
Write down 3 negative things you commonly say to yourself.
Think of a time you made a mistake, or imagine making a mistake. What do you say to yourself when you make a mistake?
What do you most commonly criticize other people for (whether you verbalize that criticism or not)? Do you criticize yourself for this same thing?
How do you talk to yourself when you’re physically tired?
How do you talk to yourself when you’re emotionally tired?
Think of a time when you were anxious, or imagine a situation that would make you feel anxious. How do you talk to yourself when you’re anxious?
How often do you praise yourself? What do you say to yourself when you praise yourself?
Think of a time you felt afraid, or imagine something that would make you feel afraid. How do you talk to yourself when you’re fearful?
Think of a time you felt sad, or imagine something that would make you feel sad. How do you talk to yourself when you’re sad?
What do you most commonly judge other people for (whether you verbalize this judgement or not)? Do you judge yourself for this same thing?

Photo of woman in red shirt sitting on couch journaling. — *Photo Anatoliy Karlyuk/stock.adobe.com*

Think of a time you were happy, or imagine something that would make you feel happy. How do you talk to yourself when you’re happy?
Think of a time you were excited, or imagine something that would make you feel excited. How do you talk to yourself when you’re excited?
How do you talk to yourself when you’re navigating a new situation or learning something new?
Think of a time you felt embarrassed, or imagine something that would make you feel embarrassed. How do you talk to yourself when you’re embarrassed?
Think of a time you were confused or you didn’t know what to do, or imagine a scenario like this. How do you talk to yourself when you’re confused?
Think of a time you were annoyed about something, or imagine something that would annoy you. How do you talk to yourself when you’re annoyed?
Think of a time you felt jealous, or imagine something that would make you jealous. How do you talk to yourself when you’re jealous?
Think of a time you accomplished a goal, or imagine accomplishing a goal. What do you say to yourself when you’ve achieved something important to you?
Think of a time you felt frustrated, or imagine a situation that would make you feel frustrated. How do you talk to yourself when you’re frustrated?
Think of a time you felt love, or imagine the feeling of love. How do you talk to yourself when you feel love?
When someone compliments you, what do you say to them? What do you say to yourself?
Think of a time you were bored, or imagine being bored. How do you talk to yourself when you feel bored?

Photo fo young woman smiling and hugging herself. — *Photo Krakenimages.com/stock.adobe.com*

Think of a time you felt lonely, or imagine what loneliness feels like. How do you talk to yourself when you feel lonely?
Think of a time you felt ashamed, or imagine what feeling ashamed feels like. How do you talk to yourself when you feel ashamed?
Think of a time someone responded positively to you. How do you talk to yourself when people respond positively to you?
Think of a time someone responded negatively to you. How do you talk to yourself when people respond negatively to you?
Think of a time you were physically ill. How do you respond to yourself when you are sick?

Think of a time you were disappointed, or imagine something that would disappoint you. How do you respond to yourself when you feel disappointed?

Think of a time you were angry, or imagine something that would make you angry. How do you respond to yourself when you feel angry?

Think of a time when you felt overwhelmed, or imagine being overwhelmed. How do you respond to yourself when you feel overwhelmed?
How often throughout the day do you check in with yourself to see what you need and how you’re feeling? On an average day, how do you respond to yourself when a need or feeling arises?

Journal prompts for evaluating and exploring your self talk

Looking at the self talk inventory you just created using the journal prompts above, what aspects of your self talk are you the most happy with? What aspects of your self talk are you the least happy with?
Looking at your self talk inventory, does the way you talk to yourself sound similar to the way others have talked to you in your life? Think about the adults who played the biggest role in your life growing up. Does the way you talk to yourself sound similar to how these adults talked to you as a child? Does the way you talk to yourself sound similar to how these adults responded to themselves or those around them? Think about other significant relationships in your life. Does the way you talk to yourself sound similar to how these individuals talked to you, or how they respond to themselves or others around them?
Focusing on the aspects of your self talk that you are most happy with, where did you learn to talk to yourself this way?
Focusing on the aspects of your self talk that you are least happy with, where did you learn to talk to yourself this way?
Focusing on the aspects of your self talk that you are most happy with, how do you think this way of responding to yourself impacts your life?
Focusing on the aspects of your self talk that you are least happy with, how do you think this way of responding to yourself impacts your life?
Focusing on the aspects of your self talk that you are least happy with, how would you respond if a friend talked to you this way? Would you talk to a friend this way? How do you think a friend would respond if you talked to them this way? How would you respond if you saw someone talking to a friend this way?
Focusing on the aspects of your self talk that you are most happy with, how would you respond if a friend talked to you this way? Would you talk to a friend this way? How do you think a friend would respond if you talked to them this way? How would you respond if you saw someone talking to a friend this way?

Focusing on the aspects of your self talk that you are most happy with, what physical sensations do you feel in your body when you talk to yourself this way?
Focusing on the aspects of your self talk that you are least happy with, what physical sensations do you feel in your body when you talk to yourself this way?
What impact do you think your self talk has on your overall wellbeing (physical, mental, and emotional)?
Are there particular emotions or situations that make it extra difficult for you to talk to yourself positively? If so, why do you think these emotions and experiences are particularly difficult to maintain positive self talk during?
Thinking about the aspects of your self talk that you are least happy with, what helpful purpose might this self talk have served at an earlier point in your life? Is this self talk still helpful? How? Is there a more helpful way that you might respond to yourself?

Journal prompts for creating positive self talk

Share on Pinterest

What does it mean to you to have positive self talk?
Write down three concrete things you would like to change about the way you talk to yourself.
Thinking about the aspects of your self talk that you are least happy with, how would you like to respond to yourself instead?
Write out five positive phrases you want to say to yourself more often. How do you feel when you write out/read these phrases? What physical sensations do you feel in your body? Why do you think you feel that way when you write/read these phrases?
What impact would improving your self talk have on your life? Write out the top three reasons improving your self talk is important to you. How can you use this list to help motivate you to improve your self talk?
What makes it difficult to improve your self talk? How can you address these difficulties?
Who in your life talks positively to you? How can you incorporate the positive things this person says to you in your self talk?
When you catch yourself engaging in negative self talk, how do you plan to respond to yourself?
When you catch yourself engaging in positive self talk, how do you plan to respond to yourself?
Write down three concrete things you can do to help you improve your self talk.
How will you implement these three concrete things in your life in the next week?
Write out a plan for checking in with yourself at a future date to see how your self talk is progressing.